THIS IS WHY I AM INSANE!

Actually it would be impossible to pinpoint.

I think if I won a million dollars I would feel better... LOL. Instantly.

Nah.

(Though I'd feel good)...

gooder even...

We are going to get a laptop soonish (as soon as I can justify it... LMAO) and then I will no longer have the "what are the kids doing behind me or in the other room" problem... Ill have eyes everywhere.

I JUST WANT MY OWN COMPUTER... personal size. is that a crime? really? didnt think.

I also want my very own owned home. That would be great. Preferably in the valley... Becuase I love it there...

I would visit and people could come for the weekend and visit me. Picture it. lovely isnt it?
I think I would be happier that way.

I would be ALOT happier if the van was running. And my list was done.

list, you ask?

I make alot of lists...

1. fix van
2. samara totally outfitted for school plus her fees paid in full and milk ordered and pictures paid for
3. a couple hundred dollars to buy kev sneakers and myself and the kids new clothes
4. a new pet. HINT HINT... allowed by the landlord..
5. another bedroom
6. a clean house
7. a dishwasher
8. a laptop
9. a day off everyweek from evil children
10. an evening off every 2 weeks even...

Lets stop at 10...

so my steps to it:

1. Call the mechanic person my friend knows and see if he will work on the van
2. doing it Tuesday I just hate not being prepared, i shoiuld be and in my world there is NO EXCUSE! I AM DISGUSTED WITH ME ON THIS.
3. Save adn perhaps in october? Though Kev needs shoes before that because all he has are flipflops.
4. mwhahahahhahaha I have an action plan.
5. save our money then when visa is paid off start searching.
6. FRICKING DO IT JACKASS
7. Once we have another bedroom I am planning on having room for a dishwasher then GETTING ONE.
8. Ill squeeze it in.
9. I am going to call the day care again and AGAIN inquire.
10. Once the van is ready again Ill work it out.